Come on, be honest…. We’ve all had one or two or zillions of those awkward moments. That’s kind of what makes them so funny…well, to the rest of the world, at least. For us, it may take a few days/weeks to recover (or sometimes never) before we find the humor in those awkward moments. So, you guessed it…I’m going to share a couple.
That Awkward Moment When…..
When you think you may have double booked your lunch date and you realize the person you’ve been talking to isn’t the same person you thought you’d be meeting. Okay, so maybe this moment was a little more awkward for my fantastic friend, Renee Schuls-Jacobson, but she’s got a way of spinning things like this into hilarity. Don’t believe me? Check out her So Wrong section of her blog. It’s dedicated to these kinds of moments!
The only time I’d ever been double booked had been by a cheating ex-boyfriend back in high school (he double booked me and 3 other girls for the same night). I broke up with him and it never happened again…until yesterday.
So here’s what happened. Renee and I had been chit chatting back and forth between our blogs, email, Twitter and Facebook. She’d recently bought a summer place down in my neck of the woods and we’d discussed meeting up. A couple of days ago we messaged each other about finally meeting face to face (Yup! You’ve got it. Up until yesterday we’d never actually met in person). Anyway, we talked on the phone and decided to meet at a restaurant in her part of town. Having arrived early, I texted her to let her know I was going to look around in the store next door. Heck, I’m a sucker for Kirkland’s and they had a big sale going on! She had arrived early, too. She sent me a message telling me she’d meet me in there, so I responded with the color of my shirt–just in case she didn’t recognize me from the few pictures I’ve put up online.
Renee walks in, gives me a warm hug and we do a little browsing, then head to the sporting goods store next door. Suddenly she stops dead in her tracks and shushes me.
“Hang on for a second while I figure this out,” she says, fiddling with her phone, flustered. Under her breath she keeps muttering something about “how did this happen?” and “crap!” and a similar things.
Concerned, I ask her what’s going on. She finally tells me she thinks she might have double booked me and a new neighbor friend she’d been talking to at the same time, but she wasn’t sure. The problem? She had talked to both me and this new neighbor friend of hers at around the same time…and didn’t save our names in her phone, so she had thought she was talking to the neighbor lady when she’d been talking to me. Icing on the cake, she thought she might have told one of us that she wasn’t going to be able to meet with one of us based on a prior engagement, but wasn’t sure who…or if she’d imagined that conversation. Even better, when she assigned my name to my number she inadvertently deleted this other woman’s number and how to contact her.
The whole thing was a hilarious cluster fuck. Was I offended? No. I was too busy laughing. She had vacation brain! Plus, once she realized that it was me she talked to both times, she started breathing again and we had a riot of a day. There are some people you meet for the first time and it’s a bit strained for a while…. This was NOT the case with us. Of course, we had the mother of all icebreakers with the little snafu beginning, but I think it would’ve been that way regardless. In fact, our introduction was as fun to me as my first meeting with my BFF, Amadiex. Her little brother was throwing rocks and sticks at me- I put him in a full Nelson to make him stop, and a lifetime friendship was born!
I’m sure, as this is only from what I know of this story, Renee probably has a slightly different view on what happened. But it’s not fair for her to be left out to dry alone, so here’s one about me….
That Awkward Moment When…
You find yourself on your knees in front of a Dom and his submissive…at work. You guys are well familiar with my playful streak. You may have even figured out that my tastes can be somewhat less than “vanilla”. As if that’s not enough, I’m a bit of a control freak…and I understand the connotations to kneeling for a Dom. To say I was a bit disconcerted is putting it mildly!
Imagine this scenario. There I am, a manager in retail, wearing a skirt and heels. I’m working a double and it’s nearing the end of the evening. My employees are all with customers when a guy walks in with his lady. They get checked in and sit down on a nearby bench sofa. Because there is a wait, I decide to walk over and try to triage this tech support related issue. The young lady is pretty soft spoken, so I lean down to hear what she’s trying to say. Because my feet are aching and I’m in a skirt, I decide to kneel in front of them. Afterall, I’m not trying to stick my butt out for the whole world to see and it gives me a chance to take some pressure off my abused feet.
I ask her for her phone, and as I hold out my hand I happen to look up. She is wearing a hemp necklace (something other folks may refer to as a “collar”). This particular necklace had a circular silver colored pendant woven in. The thing was engraved….”Property of…” I’m sure if the disc were flipped over, I would’ve found the gentleman’s name.
I won’t lie. My first reaction was to blink a couple of times before looking back up. Nope. It was not just my imagination. My second reaction? “Oh, HELL no!” Fortunately that one was only in my head. I took a deep, calming breath and let it out. I was working. As long as the guy didn’t try to approach me or make a comment assuming my kneeling meant more than it actually did, we’d be good. Honestly? I’m not sure at all how I would’ve responded if he’d misconstrued my kneeling as a sign of my submission to him.
Thankfully, that awkward was only in my mind…. Ah, how different situations can be read through the eyes of someone with a granule of knowledge. LOL!
C’mon. Admit it… One or both of these situations made you either laugh or shake your head. I’m pretty sure you have a few “Awkward Moments” of misunderstanding you could share with us…. In fact, I’d love for you guys to tell me some of yours so Renee and I won’t have to be embarrassed alone!
Guess it could’ve been worse…. At least an awkward moment like the one in this Alan Jackson video!
Man, I hope your parents and older relatives don’t read your blog! Talk about awkward!
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LOL! Right?
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Ha Ha Ha…yes, that would be very awkward! I’m pretty sure she might be disowned…at least by one person…ha ha ha
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Mmmmmhmmmm….
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Okay, That awkward moment when…
You text someone talking shit about someone else, but you send it to that person.
This actually happened to me at work recently, but I wasn’t the perpetrator. A coworker and I were talking about someone and she sent an email meant for me to the person we were talking about. So she has to play it off like the email was actually about me! She did a pretty good job. I don’t know if the other person realized what was really going on…
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Oh…that one can be lethal! Was it really bad?
Had a fellow manager accidentally send a text talking about sending out termination paperwork to the employee he was trying to fire once. Needless to say, HR wouldn’t push that one through because of those actions.
The funniest one? Former employee sent a text to someone I worked with thinking it was one of his buddies. They had the same first name. The message? Something about leaving town for a while because he’d given some girl an STD and he’d just had to call all the people he’d been “in contact” with to notify them. Doh!
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That awkward moment when…You run out the front door to chase a loose dog that continually poops in your yard off the front lawn and you remember you just got out of the shower. Yup the towel is on the porch. (The dog and owner both fled the scene)
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Oh my word!!!! I cracked up. One of my dogs recently got loose (I carry poop bags and pick up) and ran into my neighbor’s back yard..though my neighbors kept their clothes on. Bummer! Thanks for sharing!
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My hubbie had that awkward feeling on our second date: We met through a dating site and he saw one of his previous dates who it turned out had used a decade-old photo and I think he’d had to let her down gently or something. Anyway, we were walking through a store when he suddenly ducked behind some shelves and refused to move. I’m pretty certain she spotted him, though, because we bumped into her three times that day! Let’s say we’re not all normal and nice in the online dating scene! (Actually I have a few stories of my own from online dating!)
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LOL! Yeah. Online dating leaves for some awkwardly sticky stories. In fact, just the other day, Jenny Hansen, another blogging buddy, did a post about it. http://jennyhansenauthor.wordpress.com/2013/07/25/what-never-to-say-on-the-first-date/
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Hehe thanks for the heads up, it’s a great post (garcon!). It’s not hard to see why dating is an endless source of writing comedy!
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That awkward moment when you’re wearing a skirt and your underwear have been through the wash one too many times and they fall down your legs while you’re trotting down the stairs in a crowd. You don’t want to draw attention to yourself by hitching them up or bending over to slip them off your feed and pocket them. What do you do?
Leave them there on the stairs for some poor soul to stumble across later on. Or for some even poorer soul to trip on.
Yup. That’s what I did. Never saw those undies again. And never tried to wear a stretched out pair again.
Thanks for getting the embarrassment flowing, Kitt! LOL! Love your stories.
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Believe it or not, that actually happened to my grandma with her slip in the middle of downtown Detroit. She told is she just stepped out of them and kept walking and prayed no one noticed it was hers. She was afraid to turn around & look back!
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oh, boy I laughed out laud at work reading this. Never thought that could actually happen. But, I guess, there is the first time for everything and for some it is a repeated joy if they do not learn.
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There sure is!
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Lol! I love reading about awkward moments like that. They were all quite entertaining, including the ones in the comments. 😀
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They’re fun, aren’t they? I’m digging the awkward moment comments, too!
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How about running to get to class on time and tripping as you enter the door way and instead of just falling you slide across the classroom floor. Talk about making an entrance!
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Oh, my! Blushing on your behalf. Did you pop back up and say “Tada!” Like it was on purpose?
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No I was 14 and a freshman, try embarrassed! Classmates were laughing, so was my teacher who tried in vein not to as he asked if I needed a band aid! Dick!!!….lol
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Oh, my. Poor you!
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When I was younger I had a bit of an attitude and irritated with work (was a dispatcher) as i had been working five days a week 6pm-6am for over a year, so needless to say my patience was gone. I thought i was messaging my co worker across me about our lead and what i thought of her. Well oops sent that message to my lead instead! Received a really harsh write up as i deserved it, and my lead Michelle and I became friends and are to this day.
I learned this lesson and live by this motto as a result.
“Don’t let the book jacket fool you”
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Oh, yeah. Awkward way to learn that lesson, but at least your lead was forgiving!
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Very, my ex has called me by his first wife’s name on multiple occasions, of course in public too. OUCH
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Eek! My sister accidentally called my cousin’s wife by his ex-wife’s name. So mortifying!
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Exactly as I am no sasquatch! …lol.. that was so bad..
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OMG these are hilarious, enjoyed this so much even the comments 🙂 I once slept in class with my saliva dripping on the side of my cheek. Thats awkward and eww. ( I’m going to regret writing this ) 😉
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Nah, that’s not so bad. I’ve fallen asleep on a boyfriend and drooled on his chest. It could have been worse. 😉 Glad you’re enjoying our awkward moments. 😀
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Great Kitt! I love the “So Wrong” idea.
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Me, too! Renee does that category exceptionally well on her blog.
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Sweet! I’ll check it out!
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That first awkward moment had me laughing – I can just see your friend madly digging into her purse to find her phone. Oh “Vacation Brain” 😀
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It was quite hilarious. Vacation brain can be dangerous. Renee is an awesome lady, so I felt bad for her stress.
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OMG! In the airport now and just seeing your post! Damn girl! You are so freakin’ good! And I love how you linked my flakiness to your *ahem* encounter. Soooo funny! Thank you for being easy. IYKWIM. See you soon! (And I’d say you captured everything perfectly!)
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LOL! I couldn’t leave you all by yourself in “embarrassing moments”. Really loving the rest of the Awkward Moments everyone else is sharing, too! I can’t wait to see you again. (You knew I went back to look for any references to screaming, didn’t you? LOLOL)
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Totally didn’t scream. But it makes the story even better. I am a dork. And now you know it. For reals.
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LOL Hilarious! I wish I could’ve been a fly on the wall when you and Renee were chatting – though I feel as though I just watched it. 🙂 Gotta love those ever-so-human moments! I’ve had LOADS.
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You would have been a welcome addition, August! Hanging out was a blast. We spent the whole afternoon together. We talked about all sorts of stuff including writing. Strange aftermath factoid? Turns out the other lady is a writer, too, though we didn’t know it at the time. She would’ve fit right in!
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Oh that’s excellent. Have done the first. Can’t say the second has happened though. lol
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LOL! Strangely enough, I doubt anyone else that was there would have picked up on the connotation or understood the dynamic. Lucky me, right? LOL! The guy definitely did not give off the power vibes you read about in romances, either. I mean, if he were like Master Z, Cullen or one of the Shadowlands guys, I might not have been so perturbed. Instead I was definitely the most dominant personality (which made being on my knees that much more awkward).
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My, oh my! This life we lead…
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Truly!
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Okay!
First. I know it’s a bit racy for your staid and sane blog, Kitt, but Alan Jackson is welcome to put his boots by my bed any old time. Along with those jeans and shirt. I have all my front teeth. I’m qualified.
Second, you frigging got to meet Renee???? How cool is that? Two of my blog buddy rock stars in the same location.
Third, the Foxworthy clip reminded my of an embarrassing moment. At the dentist. While getting my teeth professionally whitened. [It’s sentence frag day, here. I do know how to construct a proper sentence.]
They put this inner-tube like thingie in my mouth to hold it open. [Yeah. Like I ever had a problem with that.] I took myself to my happy place, a tree house in the Rockies. And, fell asleep. And, snored. For one full hour, I snored. I even woke myself no less than six times with the volume of those snores.
And, I knew I was doing it, but couldn’t stop myself. Never mind that the exam rooms were alcoves off the main corridor and open to the reception area. I was freaking sleeping and only stirred the three times the hygienist came in to add more whitening formula.
When it was over, and the mouth thingie came out, I asked her how loud I’d snored. Was it really bad? Could everyone hear me? Her answer?
“Don’t worry about it. We like it when our patients feel comfortable enough to sleep. It helps relax the other patients, too.”
Yeah. I’ll bet. It’s hard to be nervous and laughing out loud at the same time.
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LOL! Gloria, I’d love to spend one day inside your head. I’d probably have fodder for my blog for years! You never fail to crack me up.
As for the snoring…WTH. You can’t be blamed for that. Let’s be real…they put you in a position to fail. How can a person not fall asleep with her head tipped back and not expect you to go to your happy place when they’re playing with your teeth, especially with a bit in your mouth. Of course at that angle you’re going to snore loudly.
Alan Jackson…my mother-in-law has a HUGE crush on him. You may have to battle her for him. I’ll warn you now…she’s in her late 70’s so you might think you can take her, but she was teaching aerobics into her late 60’s and still works out daily. (In fact, she still WORKS!!!)
Renee is awesome. So glad I got to meet her. Maybe next time I’m in Big D, we’ll get the opportunity to meet up!
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If you come to The Big D and don’t let me know so I can MAKE time to hook up with you, I will…
*sputtering*
Nope. Not gonna’ happen, so I don’t have to think of an appropriate threat.
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LOL! Girl, I would NOT pass up on an opportunity to meet you. You’re all kinds of awesomesauce and on my wishlist of blog peeps I’ve got to meet. 😀
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That is one of my very favorite Alan Jackson songs!! 🙂
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Awww! That’s awesome. He can be such a hoot!
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Oh, this is great!!! I love that Renee! How fun that you guys met. I want to meet so many blogger buddies! 🙂
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Me, too! I’m sure there will be opportunities to meet a few more. Patricia Sands gets to my area from time to time, so my fingers are crossed that we’ll get a chance to have a glass of wine or cup of coffee…or whatever. 🙂
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I’m a closet submissive. That might have been mortifying but it sounded hot to me, LOL
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LOL! I’m a smidge dominant, so I’m sure you can understand why it sat a teenie bit funny with me. Isn’t it great that we all have our kinks and none are exactly the same? 🙂
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Your pick: the time my mother caught me masturbating…or the time I was bashing a bitch of a client to my staff after I hung up the phone, only my speakerphone was still on and she hadn’t actually hung up. The next words out of the speakerphone froze us all. (We lost the client but it did feel good. So did the masturbating.)
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LMAO! That sounds like a dealer’s choice. 😉 glad they both felt good, though. It’s the best possible way to be bad! 😉
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