#ThreeForAll Is On the Road while #FourOneNight Reveals Itself

So, this little Kitt’s gone Katting around, today. Okay, so the play on my name may be a smidge cheesy, but the fact that I’ve been invited to hang out over at S.J. Maylee’s place is true.

Yep, I’m over there sharing a little bit about my book, Three For All, and would really appreciate if you guys would drop by and share the love for me.

But in the meantime, I thought I’d also share a little treat with you guys as a thank you for all your loyalty and support.

My next book in the series will be launching in time for Valentine’s Day and I thought you guys might like to see the new cover. Hope ya’ll love it as much as I do! Thanks in advance to the folks who’ve approached me about either hosting a Cover Reveal or sharing the love of Three For All on their blogs! I really appreciate the support. If you’d like to help a sista’ out, please email me and I’d be thrilled to set something up with you. 🙂

Now, on to the cover…. (I’m going to leave the excerpts to the folks who’ve generously offered their services for now.)

Lessons in Life and Love from Once Upon a Time

I wasn’t the girl who was hooked on Once Upon a Time from the beginning. I’d recorded it with the intent to watch, but somehow, I never did. Until the end of this last season. What I found was brilliant script writing, fairy tale characters I remembered, but spun to be virtually unrecognizable in the coolest way possible….and some awesome lessons in living and loving well if you paid attention.

If you know anything about fairy tales, you know that there are certain inalienable truths.

According to Shakespeare, “The path of true love never did run smooth.” The folks in Storybrooke, Maine would agree with that. In fact, they don’t even know it, but they’ve been trapped by a curse placed upon them by the evil queen to gain her revenge on Snow White, a local school teacher. Yes, when she activated the curse, she moved her world of magic into our world, a place where magic didn’t exist. In this world, no one remembered who they were or got happy endings…well, not until the “savior” arrived and the curse was broken.

Lesson: True love takes a lot of work, faith (both in yourselves and each other), and sacrifice. Problems and challenges don’t just disappear because you’ve found your true love. In fact, there will be times when you will lose sight of what’s important. In those times, the other part of you will rise up to the challenge–to believe and fight enough for you both.

Charming said it best. “I will always find you.”

Then there are the villains, Regina, the Evil Queen, and Rumplestiltskin…and even, to an extent, Regina’s mother, Cora. They’ve made some terrible, hateful decisions in the name of anger and revenge. But they are capable of love…and when they embrace that rarely used part of their souls, amazing things happen.

Lesson: With the power of love, no one is irredeemable. Flaws are there, and seen, but true love is acceptance, warts and all. Love means letting go of hate and anger, sometimes sacrificing yourself, to put someone else’s happiness and well being above your own.

Sometimes people will lose their way, forget who they are. In Storybrooke, this has happened quite literally. Charming lost his memory, for a while the entire town had no memory of their life in The Enchanted Forest, and Belle literally lost all her memories of Rumplestiltskin and their love. Sometimes losing their way can also be metaphoric. Snow lost sight of who she was in her quest for revenge, Pinnochio forgot his path and his responsibilities, even Red (yes, that’s Little Red Riding Hood) lost sight of the true meaning of family and acceptance when she met her mother.

Lesson: Those who love you will remember who you are and hold on to you. They won’t let you stay lost for long. They’ll remind you of just how important you truly are.

In life, we’re all bound to make mistakes. They don’t have to define us. In Once Upon A Time, Emma had given Henry up for adoption, thinking she had nothing better to offer him. He found her, and she fell in love. He was adopted by Regina, the Evil Queen, who had cast a curse of vengeance against Snow and Charming, Emma’s parents.

Lesson: Everyone has an opportunity to redeem themselves if they’re brave enough to take the chance. Love means owning your mistakes and moving forward. They don’t have to define who you are.

And finally, the most important lesson of all– “True Love is the most powerful magic of all.”

Yes, I’ve definitely got a soft spot for fairy tales. Always have. I love the way these ones are being told and blended into this beautiful tapestry. Are you a Once Upon A Time fan? Are there any lessons from the show that you’d like to impart? Is there another show that’s gotten you hooked? What life/love lessons did you catch?

 

If Love Is A Battlefield….

…is sex the weapon?

How many times have we all heard-

“Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?”

I can’t tell you how much I’ve come to dislike that statement now that I’m older and understand it better. Why, you ask? I’m about to tell you.

Sometimes I wonder how it is that we still don’t seem to have put this statement together with the historical idea of women as chattel. First, let me clarify, I’m not about to say that anyone should be in a rush to lose their virginity as it’s not really worth anything. Not. At. All. Most of you have followed me long enough that you know I find beauty in virtue and purity, just as I find beauty in sensual pleasures.

What I am saying is that the originating statement came from a time where virginity was just another bartering tool used to bring the highest price possible for selling off your daughter to improve the family’s social and financial standing….and is as old as time. Well, a time when women didn’t really have much say in how their own lives could/would be shaped. Personally I’m grateful not to be living in that time, but I wonder if we’re really so far removed from some of their ideologies, especially when it comes to sex. In fact, there are times when I research back on that time and wonder if they weren’t more progressive in their thinking after the initial marriage than we are today.

Here’s the thing, if you’ve still got your purity intact, to me, the gifting is in finding someone worthwhile to share that special moment with…who will help enrich the experience by their mere presence. The reality is, you only have your virginity once, so it should be special….a celebration of transition in life. Sharing it should happen with someone who appreciates the moment and you. If that means someone you love, someone you like a lot, or the person you intend on sharing the rest of your life with, great! It should not be the carrot dangled at the end of a stick a la “I’ll let you have my virginity if you ‘put a ring on it’.” Yes, I’m saying I don’t agree with the Beyoncé song. I just don’t think ultimatums are a good way to kick off a relationship.

Now you’re saying, “But Kitt, what about those of us who aren’t virgins?” Let’s be honest, there are more of you reading this blog than there are of the “chaste” variety. Am I right? 😉 Well, I’m so glad you asked…because it was something that happened a couple of weeks ago that prompted this whole post.

My dear friend, Ande Lyons, interviewed Drs. Chuck and Jo-Ann Bird aka The Love Birds, relationship counselors and clinical sexologists, on her Loving And Lasting radio show about how to keep your marriage/relationship sexually satisfying. One of the calls they took was from a woman who was starting a newer relationship. She’d discussed the fact that she was a firm believer in starting as she meant to continue. For her, that meant she discussed how important sex and intimacy was for her.

I thought what The Lovebirds said…”Good for her!” Begin as you mean to continue, right? She set her expectations early. She opened the lines of communication regarding sex immediately! Her candor regarding her desires was refreshing…and not usually the norm in many relationships.

Instead, what we usually see is more weaponization of sex. How many times have you heard or seen people trade sex for status and a certain type of lifestyle? These are the “I won’t date you unless you’re in a certain financial bracket or have a job I consider impressive enough to brag about to my friends.” We all know them. They value people by the size of their wallets, etc. Those are the obvious ones….and most of us agree that it’s not really a good place to expect any real happiness or intimacy. We feel for the poor sucker that gets caught in that honey trap (usually because they fail to see past the superficial).

Personally, if you are intrigued enough with a person to give dating the ol’ ‘college try’, I don’t see the issue with taking the rest of him/her for a test drive, too. Imagine what would happen if folks knew whether or not they were sexually compatible from the beginning. What if you discussed your likes and dislikes early? Might it not set the tone for sharing what’s working and not working for you in the bedroom in the future? Wouldn’t you feel more comfortable bringing up fantasies as the relationship progresses? Discussing different sexual avenues you’d like to explore together as the trust grows? In fact, August McLaughlin did a great post nailing on the head so many of the reasons why it’s okay to test the waters when she took on Steve Harvey’s book touting why women should wait 90 days before engaging.

Don’t get me wrong, there are sometimes valid reasons to wait. For example, if you know that  sex has a way of becoming a huge distraction from everything else for you, you might want to wait. Why? To give yourself an opportunity to really get to know the person you’re getting intimate with before you let yourself feast. What isn’t cool is if the reason you’re holding back is because you’re afraid he/she won’t respect you if you “put out.” This isn’t high school. If that is truly a concern you feel with the person you’re dating…he/she is probably not the right person for you. A truly decent person won’t judge you because you are honest with them and want to create a physical intimacy. Pardon my language, but only a$$holes tend to sit there, throwing stones (and we all know what they say about people in glass houses who do that).

Even more bothersome is when sex becomes weaponized once you’re actually in the relationship, but it happens all too often. In fact, I’ve even heard folks giving advice to do just that and wanted to scream! What am I talking about? Say your partner has done something that ticked you off. Instead of talking about it rationally and calmly, you decide to sleep in the other room. You want something done…. You offer sex as the reward if they do it, or threaten to withhold if they don’t.  This makes sex a threat and a weapon.

Why do we wield it this way when intimacy is so crucial to relationships? Although finances is a large cause of divorce, so is loss of intimacy. I talked to a gal pal a few months back who didn’t feel important in her relationship with her husband. One of the things that stood out to me was the fact that she said if he’d just touched her casually or kissed her for no reason other than he wanted to, she would know she mattered. Sex had become his weapon that he only brought out when he sensed that she was angry, he wanted to shut her up or escape true intimacy…at least that’s the way it felt to her. I know just as many women who use sex the same way she described.

The funny thing is she blames herself….because she allowed it to happen. Had those intimate discussions happened in the beginning, things might have been different. Had she set her expectations from the start…and allowed them to grow together in their passion and discovery, maybe she wouldn’t feel so unimportant.

Sex should be a tool to bring you closer together, not a weapon to hold over someone else. And if, by chance, you find yourself in this predicament….it’s not hopeless. That’s the other thing I loved about The Love Birds….they offered help for those who can’t fix it on their own. Relationships aren’t always easy, but they should be cherished.

Have you ever used sex as a weapon? What did you learn from doing so? Have you ever had sex used against you? How did it make you feel? Do you agree or disagree with anything I’ve said? Share with me…. Whether you agree or don’t, I’d love to hear from you. I learn so much from what you guys share…and I love you all for it!

When Ireland Meets #BeneathManhattanSkies

My friend, the beautiful and sweet Emma Meade, has stopped by for a quick chat and to share with us her newest release, Beneath Manhattan Skies.

For those of you who don’t know Emma, she was one of the first friends to welcome me on my blog. Despite our different time zones (Emma’s in Ireland), we’ve forged a wonderful friendship based on our mutual love of hunky heroes from some of our favorite Supernatural tv shows, including Supernatural, and great music.

When I found out that Emma had released a new book I jumped at the opportunity to share her (and her new book) with you. Hope you guys enjoy!

Me:Thanks for stopping by today, Emma! So, as folks probably figured out by my intro above, your love of the supernatural started with TV shows. What was the first show to get you hooked?

Emma:The X-Files. I think I was ten years old when I came across a trailer for a new alien show, and I ran to my dad, all excited to tell him about it. Myself and my big sis, Lucy, would huddle on an armchair together each week for Mulder and Scully’s latest adventure. The X-Files was my first major TV obsession and I fancied Krycek like mad, especially when he went bad. 🙂

Me: Out of curiosity, What made you choose New York/Manhattan as the backdrop for this book?

Emma: In Under the Desert Moon, the protagonist, Erin Harris, always dreamed of going to art college in New York. I never really planned on writing a follow-up novel, but when I decided to go ahead about a year ago and see what Erin was up to after high school. I wanted to make sure her dream of studying in The Big Apple came true. And New York is such a contrast to Erin’s small hometown, a sleepy place in Arizona called Copperfield.

Me: As a follower of your blog, I know you have a passion for music. Were there any specific songs that helped to inspire specific scenes in this book?

Emma: “Use Somebody” by Kings of Leon is one of Erin’s favourite songs. She’s a young woman, it’s her first time living away from home, and she’s looking for romance and passion, and this song makes her think of being with the vampire James, the first guy she fell in love with. The scene on the roof of Erin’s apartment when she and James can’t keep their hands off each other, is a result of this song being on repeat in her mind.

Me: Oooh! That’s great! So, speaking of Erin, what character traits do you like best/least about her?

Emma: Erin’s probably a little too serious for her own good. Her mother died when she was a young teenager, her father is a drunk, so Erin’s had to make the transition into adulthood largely alone. It’s no wonder she’s not as carefree as other girls her age. She has to put herself through college and has no parental support, financially or otherwise to fall back on. I’d like to see her let loose a bit more. She’s a strong women. That’s her best trait. She’s been through a lot and gets thrown into some vampire chaos in New York, yet she keeps her cool.

Me: She sounds fantastic! Just the sort of character I’ve always loved. A bit of a badass Buffy. 😉 Can I talk you into sharing a bit more?

Beneath Manhattan Skies Blurb-

November in New York is cold but full of possibility for college freshman Erin Harris. When her twin brother, Nick, shows up on her doorstep for a surprise visit, Erin is delighted. Unfortunately, Nick’s arrival coincides with the discovery of a body outside her apartment building, a body drained of blood. Right away, Nick assumes vampires are involved. He’s not exactly their biggest fan since Erin dated one in high school.

Juggling nosy roommates, a first date with a gorgeous guy from college and a brother on a Van Helsing kick is enough to keep any nineteen year old girl busy – And then Erin’s old flame walks back into her life.

Is Erin destined to be caught up in supernatural shenanigans, or will she choose a different path?

Beneath Manhattan Skies follows the character Erin Harris from Under the Desert Moon, but it can be read as a standalone story.

Cover Artist: Najla Qamber 

Teaser: Erin is chatting to Tommy, one of her college buddies in a club.

“My father wouldn’t be so understanding.” Erin frowned, not liking to think about her dad. “Did she have a boy or girl?” Erin shrugged in apology for not remembering.

“A boy. I feel sorry for my sister. She was surrounded by us growing up.”

“I’m sure it wasn’t that bad. She had a cool big brother.” She groaned inwardly. Why did she have to say that?

Tommy looked at her. Erin thought she saw a hint of a smile hovering around his lips. Where the hell was Sadie with the drinks? That girl was in big trouble for setting this up. A blush rose in Erin’s cheeks. She was grateful for the dim lighting in the bar.

“So, I’m cool, am I?” Tommy said after a moment, smiling easily again.

The tension alleviated and Erin breathed normally. “I thought you might have noticed that. You have a motorcycle. That automatically puts you in the cool club.”

“I’d like to take you out on the bike.”

And the hard-to-breathe thing started again.

About the Author:

Emma Meade lives in Ireland where it rains a lot. Reading and writing supernatural fiction, watching marathon re-runs of Buffy and drinking lots and lots of tea are some of her favourite activities. She’s never met a vampire, but thinks it would be kind of cool to meet one. Visit her on her blog, Emma’s Ramblings on Supernatural fiction at emmameade.com or on her website emmameadebooks.com

Website:  emmameadebooks.com

Blog:  emmameade.com

Twitter:  @EmmaMeadeIrl 

Goodreads:  https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4229395.Emma_Meade

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/emmameadewrites

Amazon Author Page:  http://www.amazon.com/Emma-Meade/e/B0064LKMK2/ref=ntt_athr_dp_pel_1

Amazon.com –  http://amzn.to/HZtjxO

Amazon.uk –  http://www.amazon.co.uk/Beneath-Manhattan-Skies-Emma-Meade-ebook/dp/B00GPKHN22/ref=la_B0064LKMK2_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1384966212&sr=1-2

Smashwords –  https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/374189?ref=emmaM83

Barnes & Noble  – http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/beneath-manhattan-skies-emma-meade/1117444078?ean=2940045420013&cm_mmc=AFFILIATES-_-Linkshare-_-TnL5HPStwNw-_-10:1&r=1

Kobo –  http://store.kobobooks.com/en-US/ebook/beneath-manhattan-skies

iTunes –  https://itunes.apple.com/ie/book/beneath-manhattan-skies/id747022107?mt=11

Heroes, Mentors and Making Things Happen

“I don’t know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know; the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who have sought and found how to serve.” ~ Dr. Albert Schweitzer

I’m not sure exactly when the realization dawned; that heroes and mentors were different entities. Not that they can’t co-exist. They can. But they can also be entirely separate of one another.

Me and my hero

For example, if you were to ask me who my hero was growing up, my answer would have been my mom. In fact, if you were to ask me today, my answer would still be the same. But do I consider her a mentor? No. I look up to her. I love the values she believes in. I hope to be as firm in my faith as she has always been. She’s been through some of the toughest things you can imagine and kept her belief, her joy, and her family together. I hope I inherited her strength.

Of course, being who I am, I looked up the definitions and here’s what Merriam-Webster had to say:

Hero-

: a person who is admired for great or brave acts or fine qualities

: a person who is greatly admired

: the chief male character in a story, play, movie, etc.

Mentor-

: someone who teaches or gives help and advice to a less experienced and often younger person

Strange as it sounds, despite the definition, my teachers were never people I considered to be mentors, either. Although they taught me and I respected them, it was more clinical. Not bone deep…pushing me to grow, encouraging me, and driving me to be more.

Maybe it’s because I was a girl with whom knowledge came easily, but it wasn’t until my late 20’s that I’d ever truly felt challenged…in a good way. I skated my way through most things based on natural ability, charm, a lot of common sense and my own driven nature. Then things changed and I discovered my first mentor.

No longer happy with the career path I’d had for the first 10 years of my working life, I decided to shift from medically related to retail sales. As a sales rep and eventually supervisor, my natural love of and ability to read people made me highly effective. I was quickly promoted up through the ranks into a single location manager role.

Then I was given the opportunity of a lifetime. I had a specialty, you see. I was great at networking and being able to build mutually beneficial relationships in a shared partnership environment. So when my company decided to create a manager position that encompassed 4-5 smaller scale locations (much like a mini-district manager), my boss considered the position designed for me, and a no-brainer. The problem was that there were no guidelines, boundaries or examples because the role was literally just created. It would be a trial and error situation where we figured things out along the way. In commissioned sales, this was definitely not the norm. For the first time, I struggled. My results were inconsistent.

Strangely, through this struggle, I discovered my first mentor. I already knew her. She was my boss. Her name was Ashley. When we sat down for my first performance appraisal I received my first less than stellar score. Frustrated, feeling like I was doing everything I possibly could, I asked her what I could do. She looked me in the eye and said, “I’d like you to work on one thing this year. Hold your team accountable. Don’t let them get away with excuses.” In fact, she took it one step further, and it’s a lesson I’ve never forgotten. She said, “I don’t accept excuses from you, so why are you allowing it from them? When you allow your team to get away with excuses you’re sending them a message. You’re letting them know you don’t believe they’re capable of anything more.”

She didn’t micro-manage me. She didn’t coddle me. She told me the biggest thing she thought would improve my business and let me sink or swim, but she was there to listen and give advice whenever I chose to reach out. In the past it was easy to sway my team to my point of view. I was beside them all day. In this role, my staff only saw me one day a week as I rotated locations. She was right. I couldn’t simply talk to them and be done with it. They needed to know that if they didn’t follow the action plans I rolled out, there would be consequences. I got very good at accountability. My team developed into her “go to” group whenever she needed strong business results regardless of where our company shifted their areas of importance. To this day I look up to her and hold her up as an example of an incredible leader.

Fast forward to today and why I’m telling you this story…..

As many of you know, a little over a year ago I decided to pursue writing seriously. Honestly, when I toyed with the idea in my mind, I had no idea if I had what it took to do this. For all I knew, publishing a book was a pipe dream. Shoot, I’d been writing most of my life but never pursued it because when I was growing up, the only option was New York and, for the most part, you had to know someone/have an ‘in’ to even be considered.

It meant the world to me that my sister and my best friend both told me, “I always thought you should’ve been a writer anyway.” But let’s face it. They loved me. They were biased.

But…a mutual friend was not. When I told her my dreams of writing, she asked what I wanted to write. I honestly don’t think she expected me to say erotica/erotic romance. She surprised me, though. She asked if I had a sample she could read… somewhere around 10,000 words. Suddenly I was terrified. Why? Because she’d already been successful in this field. She’d actually won the Maggie Award. Her name is Kaye Chambers.

Instead of laughing, she took me under her wing and taught me. Sure, sometimes it was the little things like how to properly format Word while writing. Other times it was to tell me that I needed to add more dialogue or that I could be awfully heavy handed when hammering a point home, and that I needed to use the subtlety techniques I used when writing poetry to allude to an idea rather than beat my readers over the head with a mallet.

Here I was, this random person who she barely knew when she reached out a helping hand…but that’s exactly what she did! The thing is, I’ve read her stuff. In fact, I LOVE the way she writes. She’s got savvy, sassy heroines and she writes these amazing opens (something I still struggle with). She creates these entire shifter universes that I think are beyond cool. It blows my mind! If you’ve never read her stuff…check out her girl Sasha, a cat shifter, in Tiger By the Tail. Or read Blood and Destiny. Her book that won the Maggie was Angelic Avenger…also awesome, but very different from the other two. It’s amazing how, sometimes, what you’re looking for is much closer than you realize if you only have the courage to ask.

I reached out with a few questions and she gave me so much more than I ever imagined. She chose to mentor me. She held my hand through my fears. She pushed me to be better. She challenged me to give more than I ever thought I was capable of…

And when I finally pushed that button to publish my first piece, she cheered me on! Her words? “You did all the work. I just gave you a bit of direction and support. You should be very proud of yourself.” With the help and belief of my mentor and the folks who love me, I was able to make my own dream come true.

One day I hope that I can do justice to the faith that Kaye has shown in me, much the way I did for Ashley. Who knows? Maybe one day I’ll be strong enough, knowledgeable enough and with enough experience to be able to mentor someone else in this new, exciting world.

What about you? Do you think there’s a difference between a hero and mentor? Who have yours been?

You Never Forget Your First…

Today is the birthday of the first celebrity I ever had a crush on. Sadly, Elvis was already dead by the time I fell in love…but his music had a way of crossing boundaries and generations. Of course, all the pre-teen me had to see was his flirtatious nature and the swivel of his hips in Blue Hawaii to fly off the deep end.

Don’t get me wrong, although Can’t Help Falling In Love is probably one of his most universally loved songs from that movie, it was his mischievous side that brought the twinkle to my eye and smile to my face.

The strange thing was that I’d actually been listening to him practically since birth, but it wasn’t until I was 11 or 12 that I saw him in a movie, flirting and swiveling his hips. I was a goner.

This was a very different side of Elvis from the one whom my parents introduced. But still, to this day, my heart appreciates that side of him, too, because it’s like he understood… having a wild streak doesn’t negate the spiritual aspects of our souls…or our need to feed it.

Although my favorite gospel song by him is In The Garden, I thought I’d throw up a tribute of some pretty amazing celebs in their own right…who knew him when he was just starting out. Plus, this one gets my toes tapping…(and I used to love singing it, myself.)

There are so many other songs I can share… tell stories about how they’ve impacted me and why, but then this post would probably be weeks long. Instead, I’ll share with you 3 of my all time favorite Elvis gifts I’ve been given.

Elvis gold record of Teddy Bear given by hubby while we were dating

It’s funny because when hubby gave me this gift, I didn’t know if he did it because he was trying to send me a message about himself or because he knew how much I loved the King. Either way, this gift is one of my priceless treasures.

A Silk Screen printed Elvis jacket from my sister

I don’t know if my sister even knows I still have this jacket as I rarely wear it. It’s a treasure, and with Florida weather often being what it is, I’d hate to sweat in this awesome gift. Also, I don’t have many tops that match… 😉

Again, from hubby… “Return to Sender”

Gosh, I love how Elvis’ eyes were superimposed into the background of this limited edition collectible. Yeah, even all these decades later I still have a mad crush on young Elvis. Strangely enough, I’ve never been to Graceland…Hmmm…maybe that needs to go on my bucket list.

So, do you remember your first celebrity crush? Who was it and why? Is the lucky recipient still with us or has he/she passed on? Can’t wait to see who you guys share…. And I’ll leave you with my last (and all time favorite) Elvis song while I look forward to your answers.

 

Warm Up This Winter With #UntangleMe by SJ Maylee

When the weather outside is frightful, there isn’t much I enjoy more than curling up under the covers with a steaming hot romance…except maybe curling up with my guy and a steaming hot romance. Afterall, if my guy is there and I start to smolder…well, let’s just say he can play fireman and put out those flames.

With the cold weather upon us, I invited my friend and blog buddy, S.J. Maylee to stop by and share a little bit about her newest novelette with Evernight Publishing.

So, without any further ado, here’s a bit about Untangle Me.

BLURB:

Ivy’s revenge on the people behind her family’s downward spiral is simple and it’s working. There’s no need to long for help from the wealthy business owners who turned their backs on her father. Ivy may be worn out, but she’s finding herself again after joining the local BDSM club.

Seth has it all. He has homes around the world and the little red speedster he dreamed of as a little boy, but none of the things he can buy satisfy him, not the socialites hanging on his arm or the submissives falling at his feet. Then, he hires Ivy to plan his next event.

Seth and Ivy enjoy each other’s company in and out of the planning stages for Seth’s charity event. Their playful bets lead them to a first date. When their secret kinks are revealed, the pair fall deep, but it’s not meant to last. Past hurts come back to haunt Ivy. Now, it’s time for Seth to use all he’s learned, regardless if he can win back the girl.

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18710704-untangle-me

EXCERPT:

Where was Seth?

Once in the center of the dance floor she turned in a circle, looking every direction.

There.

From the center seat at the bar, Seth’s direct stare held her captive. A new song excited the crowd and cheers surrounded them, but neither of them paid it any attention.

His jacket and tie were gone, giving her a closer look at his all-male body. The top button on his white shirt was undone. She wanted to undo the rest and get a glimpse at what lay underneath. Round shoulders tapered to his waist. She bit her lip as she imagined his length.

He made no move to come to her, his elbow still rested on the bar. He was a man waiting for the world to come to him.

Not the world. Her.

The comfortable confidence and the heat shining in his eyes turned her on. She swayed her hips to the hypnotic beat. Her hands felt their way up her thighs, around her hips, and an inch past her waist, he got up and walked towards her.

In no time, his feet stepped in between hers and together they rocked to the music. The drums and base from the band pushed a rhythm into her body, driving her desire. Their fingers interlaced. She snuggled closer and breathed in his clean musky scent.

She wanted to touch him, but he kept a hold on her hands. He pushed them both behind her, causing her back to arch and her breasts to press deliciously into his hard body. Heat rolled through her. She let her head fall back, exposing her neck.

His lips brushed across her collarbone. They continued to rock back and forth, their hips swaying and rubbing together. He took her wrists in one hand and his other stroked down her neck, over her shoulder, caressed the side of her breast, and around her waist to land on her butt. He squeezed her ass and pressed her into the hard ridge of his cock. She lowered her chin and moaned as she took in his expression filled with raw desire. A slow devilish smile lit his features and sent a tremble through her.

The song ended and another began while they continued their dance. He let go of her hands and she wrapped them around his neck. Both of his hands molded her ass. She nuzzled his neck, taking a nibble and a few kisses as she breathed him in. She wanted more.

Lots more.

She made her way closer to his mouth. Before she stole a kiss, she looked into his eyes. His brown eyes had darkened to the color of night, matching his hair. She sucked on her lower lip.

“You know what you’re doing, right?” he asked.

“I know I want you.”

“The Masters work the back rooms on club nights. But we can stay on the dance floor all night, if you want.”

“You’re talking about the one on one rooms?” She sucked in a breath.

“I don’t think this crowd is prepared to see what I want to do to you.”

“Can we go back there? I want to go back there.” She looked directly into his eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Of course we can’t let S.J. just leave after sharing such a tidbit… we want to know stuff, right? So here’s what S.J. wanted you to know about some of her favorite things…

Take it away, S. J!

The hero of UNTANGLE ME is a successful businessman. With all his wealth, extravagances are easy to come by. I believe luxuries don’t have to be costly or out of reach. Here are my top five inexpensive favorite things:

1. Spritz of lavender water on my pillow. Certain smells can take my stress away. There’s nothing like my mom’s cooking or a fresh cup of coffee, but when I need to quiet my mind and breath deep, a simple spray of lavender can help my mind let go and relax.
2. Chocolate. Any kind of sweet yummy chocolate is an indulgence. It doesn’t take long to enjoy a little morsel either, but they take me to a happier place.
3. A snazzy drink. For me it will probably be a cup of coffee from my favorite local coffee joint. I make an excellent cup of coffee at home, but there’s something about going out and having it done for me that makes it better.
4. Watch something funny. It doesn’t matter if it’s an old favorite or something new. Every week, I take the time to sit down, put my feet up, and laugh.
5. Call a friend. I have several friends that live several states away. Although I might not have seen them this year, a few minutes on the phone will bring us right back together and will do wonders at stripping away my stress.

These are just a few of my favorites. One of them is Ivy’s favorite too. She’s the heroine in UNTANGLE ME. You’ll have to read the story to find out which one and the heart breaking reason why she needs it. I wish I could talk about it more. I love this story and I hope you will too.

Thanks for dropping in, S.J. It’s always a pleasure to have you visit!

Author, S.J. Maylee

Still want to know more about S.J. or where to buy her book? Let me help you…

UNTANGLE ME BUY LINKS: 

Evernight Publishing: http://www.evernightpublishing.com/untangle-me-by-s-j-maylee/

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Untangle-Me-Romance-S-J-Maylee-ebook/dp/B00H3WXVTK/

Barnes & Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/untangle-me-sj-maylee/1117667188

All Romance eBooks: https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-untangleme-1367983-147.html 

BookStrand: http://www.bookstrand.com/untangle-me

S.J. MAYLEE BIO:

S.J. Maylee fell in love with storytelling at a young age and with it came a deep-seated desire for everyone to find their happily ever after. She’s finding the happy endings for her characters one steamy story at a time.

When she’s not reading or writing, you can find her caring for her garden, laughing with her two young sons, or dancing to her husband’s music. She’s a PMP (Project Management Professional), Nia instructor, and coffee addict.

As a writer she has a tendency to break hearts, but she always glues them back together.

Blog: http://SJMaylee.com

Twitter: https://twitter.com/SJMaylee

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/SJ-Maylee/339463696094996

Google+ https://plus.google.com/u/0/+SJMaylee

Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/7224328.S_J_Maylee

Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/sjmaylee/

Nothing Limiting About Setting Limits

Ever feel like the blog gods are trying to tell you something? The last couple of days have felt that way to me. It started innocuously enough… With a pic from a dirty minded friend to my FB page. The pic?

I admit it. I laughed! A lot!

I know, you’re now wondering exactly what message the blog gods were sending, aren’t you? No, this isn’t a lesson on anal admiration, though I’d be happy to write one if ya’ll have a real interest in it…or if that bee flies into my bonnet one random day. If you’re wondering what the heck a rim job is, email me privately or message me on FB or Twitter. We’ll take that one offline, but I’m happy to explain. I hate leaving someone with more questions than answers. It’s practically my civic duty to educate and enlighten my blog buddies on sex manners, dontcha know… 😉

My next sign happened in my gal pal, Sandra Bunino’s FB book group. The initial question was simple… “Genre-wise, what’s your go to?” My answer wasn’t shocking to anyone who has read my book or hung out on this blog. I said that I liked erotic romances, and lately my preferences have been toward the ménage and elements of BDSM. But, as it tends to happen when I’m involved, it didn’t stop there. There was a follow up question.

“How hardcore do you like your BDSM (to read)?”

The question was then qualified further by asking if my leanings were toward D/s stories (Dominant/submissive for those of you who don’t know the jargon) or the S & M side (Sadism & Masochism). Somehow, in my mind, this translated to limits. Yes, I’ve done a post discussing different kinks and that they’re different from one person to the next. Limits are different.

So, we’re back to the above picture… I have a close friend who read my manuscript for my second book when it was in it’s rougher stages. There was an anal scene in which part of the preparation for one of the characters included a rim job (Okay, so maybe if you didn’t know what it meant before, you may be starting to get the picture and won’t need to contact me…hehe!). This particular friend was a bit squicked out. It wasn’t her cup ‘o’ tea. It was not sexy in her mind. In fact, she found it pretty gross and unsanitary (although I’d argue that nothing about sex is sanitary). I can also say with a fair amount of certainty that she’s also never experienced it. For HER, that’s a limit.

That’s not a limit at all for me, but I respect it. I also understood pretty quickly that she’s more mainstream when it comes to what she enjoys reading. It made me realize from a writing perspective that I had to consider that a scene like that may alienate a certain type of reader and I’d have to be okay with that. It also reminded me from a personal/sexual perspective, everyone has limits. They deserve to be respected.

On to the discussion in the book group… My limits come from my background in the medically related field. I’m not into any sort of fluid play. No golden showers. No scat. No blood play. To me, those are too dangerous. Due to some personal histories, I’m also aware that breath play and capture/rape scenarios are more than likely going to be triggers for me. By trigger I mean I can’t be a part of this sort of scene. Not as the perpetrator. Certainly not as a recipient. In fact, it’s probably safe for all involved if I step away from even viewing these scenes. Although these are all hard limits for me, they are hard limits for different reasons.

Why am I telling you guys this? Because it’s important to understand that when you choose to explore the various pleasures the world has to offer with your partner, there need to be safety precautions or boundaries, if you will. The most important thing, no matter what aspect of the spectrum you decide to explore, is that you and your partner need to communicate openly and honestly. You need to know and respect each other’s boundaries. This is often considered “negotiating a scene.”

There are some things you’re going to know immediately that you never want to try. For some people that can be anything that involves pain. Some people translate pain differently and may need the pain to enhance their pleasure. If it’s pretty strong on the pain threshold, they’re more than likely masochists. One who gains sexual enjoyment from supplying that need to them? They’re sadists. Keep in mind, most sadists and masochists are not the “sick puppies” portrayed in crime drama tv.

Also, just because someone likes erotic spanking or exploring with impact toys like floggers, whips, paddles, etc. doesn’t mean they fall into the S & M side of BDSM. There are always levels. Again, communication becomes key. Why? Because maybe you’ve shown that you enjoy spanking, but are iffy about impact instruments…those might find yourself in the maybe list (aka. I’ll try it once, twice if I like it).

Other people are completely turned off by any kind of physical pain, but prefer to simply hand over their power to their partner (aka power exchange) or maybe bondage is the turn on, or sensory deprivation, or multiple partners, or exhibitionism, or voyeurism…. See what I’m getting at? The options for exploration and discovery are endless….as long as open and honest communication is happening.

The other HUGELY IMPORTANT factor? Before you go exploring, you NEED a safe word. I can’t stress this enough. Why? Because even if you trust each other implicitly, things can go wrong. Like what? Well, say there’s a repressed memory of some sort…some of these kinds of play may trigger that memory and cause a fight or flight response or worse, a panic attack. Your partner might be completely unaware you’re having this reaction, but you can stop the whole thing with one word. Or if you’re both new to play, your partner may not realize you’re hurt (and not in a pleasurable way). You say the word, they know to stop. It’s a safety precaution.

Some of the important things to communicate to your partner before you play in this manner? Any physical injuries that could be a problem, any traumatic childhood events, if you suffer from things like panic attacks or PTSD (and, if you know them, what triggers it), anything that causes a negative visceral reaction. This gives your partner a good idea of what NOT to do to ruin your playful bedroom (well, not literally…it can happen anywhere) experiments. Maybe you need help figuring out what you may find acceptable or not… There are lists that can help open those communication lines (not to mention give you an idea of all the MANY areas open for exploration).

The whole purpose of the exploration is to have fun with your partner while building intimacy. This also means that it’s just as important to communicate the positive experiences before, during, or after play with your partner so that you guys know what’s working and which rabbit hole to dive into further.

So, now it’s question time… Have there been areas you’ve heard/read about that you’ve been dying to try but a bit nervous to tell your partner? Are there terms I used that had you scratching your head and wondering what I’m talking about? Are there scenes you’ve read in a book and had no idea what it meant but were too embarrassed to ask? Anything you’ve read that you’ve found out of bounds? Ya’ll know me. I’m an open book and willing to talk about anything… (Plus, the writer in me is always dying of curiosity.) Spill it!

FYI– anyone who is truly into most alternative lifestyles including BDSM believe in the importance of “Safe, Sane & Consensual”… it’s one of the reasons it’s important to set a safe word and communicate.

Winter Warm Up

All over my Facebook this morning where freezing cold pictures of snow covered yards, cars, lawn furniture…and even some pets and children frolicking in the white stuff. Brrrr! Do you know the last time I actually enjoyed winter weather?

Winter in Germany

Yeah, that’s me with my hands in the air. Many, MANY moons ago. In another country. I’m not without understanding of how winter works… I grew up in Chicago, for goodness sake. I’ve dealt with the wind coming off Lake Michigan. And I moved to Southwest Florida for a reason… So imagine my surprise when I prepared to take my beautiful dogs out for their morning constitutional only to find the temperature was in the 40’s. Yes, a mad scramble ensued to find things like fuzzy socks and sweatshirts. It’s nearly 2 pm here. How warm did it actually get?

So it’s not as cold as where you are…don’t judge me. I freeze easily.

To be clear, I left Chicago more than 10 years ago after 2 blizzards in a row. These days I tend to get a bit whiny and cranky when I’m cold. Unfortunately, today, I can’t even shove my ice cube feet under my hubby’s legs to warm them up (and shock his system) because he’s away at training.

So, since most of us agree that cold weather is no fun once you grow up (granted the degrees of cold we all handle is different), I thought I’d go to my happy places and bring you along…

Doesn’t that just call sun and surf to mind? It just so happens that one of my dear friends married a reggae singer named Jah Niceness (well, that’s his stage name) from Jamaica. So I actually know him personally. He’s one of the sweetest, mild mannered guys I’ve had the pleasure of meeting.

This is him singing at another friend’s going away party.

What else makes me think warmer climates? For the smart alecks that may have thought “how about ice cream?” or “what about a dip in the gulf or a pool?” You’re not funny…. But maybe pictures of those things may warm me…

Like snorkeling in the Bahamas…

Yeah, that water was nice and warm….

Eh… Who am I kidding? What I really need to do is get my juices going! In my universe we all know that’s an open ended prospect that can lead to a dance floor just as easily as a bedroom. 😉 Or it can mean writing all the things that get everyone else all warmed up…. Hmmm… Maybe it can mean all three. Bah! Who am I kidding? Of course it can!

So, when your weather outside is frightful…what do you do to feel warm? Feel free to be as clean or as dirty as you please…LOL!

2013 in Review–Whew! Pretty Busy!

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2013 annual report for this blog. Thanks to everyone who has contributed to my wild and wacky year!

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 40,000 times in 2013. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 15 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.