Sensual Sweet Spots

Recently I wrote an article for the Sexual Wellness News site called The Orgasmic Body: Sexual Anatomy Basics. (Psst! I’d really appreciate if you’d head over, check it out, and maybe give it some love.) As often happens with me, the article set my mind wandering…. I mean, how could it not? We’re basically talking erogenous zones. Is there a better subject suited to my passions?

The thing is, although the article delves into the physiological, the biggest sex organ, though mentioned, was pretty much glossed over. Did you catch it? It was mentioned in the first paragraph. (I’m not going to mention it here, because I’d love for you to read the article, then come back and tell me which referral I’m flirting around.)

In that article we discussed the basics. The obvious basic. What we didn’t discuss were those sexy little nooks and crannies that we discover on ourselves and our lovers with careful and fun loving exploration. For example, did you know that the shoulder blade can be an erogenous zone? Yeah, neither did my virgin self until my boyfriend (now my husband) decided to plant his first kiss….a soft pressure of lips left on my right shoulder blade. I felt that one delicate, sensual touch go from my back to my nipples, and head further south. And all he did was lay his lips there until I felt the irresistible urge to turn around, wrap my fingers around the nape of his neck and pull his face down to mine for a kiss burned up as quickly as a wildfire.

Pulse points are erogenous zones that often get neglected once a couple is in a steady or long term relationship. The inside of the wrist, the sweet spot on the neck. Or spots like the inside of the elbow or back of the knees. And here’s the thing, ladies…. We’re not the only ones that go a little melty when those hyper sensitive spots get special attention. Men have sweet spots, too!

Have you ever wondered why it is that your man goes a little wild when, in the throes of passion, you forget yourself enough to bite down on their trapezius muscle? Or maybe it’s when you decide to rain down licks and kisses on the small of their back. Are you one who gives the cock plenty of play and appreciation, but maybe not so much his balls?

And what about the “taint” area? Lots of sensitivity there for both men and women. In fact, if you’re playing in the shower, and you’re feeling daring, have you rimmed your lover’s ass hole? Or allowed attention to yours? To be clear, I only mention shower because many find that area to be unsanitary, so it’s best to be either prepared or someplace where it’s being/has been cleaned. For men, that area can be mind blowing if they’re comfortable and/or willing to relax and let their partner explore. In fact, when properly prepared, it can be a pretty incredible experience for women, too. (Hasn’t anyone wondered why MFM ménages are all the rage these days? Because there are plenty of women who fantasize…)

There are so many awesome, incredible spots that we need to take the time to explore! With an open mind, you’d be amazed at what your partner might share with you, and how it can enhance your sex life. As one who is always learning, I’d love to throw this question to you guys…. What unexpected erogenous zones have you discovered? Was it a discovery on your partner'(s) body or yours? Yes, there’s a strong chance I will be taking your answers and exploring to see if it’s a spot that works for me, too.

As always, remember that just because a sweet spot works for one person doesn’t mean it works for everyone. BTW, ya’ll also know how much I love Aloe Cadabra. Have you seen their latest post on unusual uses people have found for their lube? I definitely appreciate their traditional uses, too, but I thought you guys might get a kick…because I was the one who used it to treat an insect sting on my dog. Hey, don’t laugh. It worked!

Enjoying Epicurian Diversity Chicago Style

My Sweet Home, Chicago!

 

There isn’t much that rejuvenates and inspires quite like a trip back to a place where you feel roots and strong ties; to land, community, and the general life. Going back home to Chicago is always a special treat for me because I get the opportunity to explore so many different ethnic foods (that I miss when I’m away). I also get the chance to spend time with people I love, who love me back and know the me I used to be and appreciate the person I’ve become. The above view is the Chicago skyline taken from the balcony of my sister’s condo where I was staying.

Mmmm…. Sushi!

I got to do all of the above on this trip…and also had the chance to enjoy the musical mecca that Chicago becomes in the summertime. I knew this trip was going to be foodie fantastic when my sister picked me up from the airport and we started our weekend with sushi. Neither her hubby nor mine are big fans, and neither were with us, so we indulged at this fantastic place called Kamehachi. Our server was wonderful, the food was beautifully prepared, and we were able to enjoy outside seating in mid-70 weather.

My sister was also a big fan of their hibiscus tea. Me? I believe you don’t fruit the salad and you don’t flower the tea…LOL! But it worked for her, and it was refreshing. Did I mention we also did not have a wait to be seated? Heck, in Chi-town, the Open Table app is all the rage to prevent wait times, but it never became a concern. We still used it several times, though. Better safe than sorry.

Tapas and Café Iberico

Dinner that night was later, so we decided on some fun, not too heavy fare. One of the beautiful things about Chicago means being able to WALK to many of the places we visit. This beautiful evening was no exception. After my brother-in-law got off work we headed to Café Iberico for some tasty tapas!

For those of you who don’t know the history of tapas, it’s kind of interesting. This was Castillian Spain’s version of bar food. In fact, even the word tapas is a reference to lids….often used to cover the food to keep fruit flies away. 🙂 Want to know more about the stuff? Click HERE for your Spanish history lesson!

Lemon Pancakes and Asparagus, mushroom, and bacon omelet

The following morning my sister introduced me to the joys of brunch at Kingsbury Street Café. Nestled next to the VIP Lounge (Yes, Phil, it’s a strip club), it served the most luscious lemon pancakes. Because my sister’s sweet, and I’m a bit savory, we decided to order stuff we could share. Their multigrain toast baguettes were fresh, with a sweetness that did not require any jams (at least in my opinion). The omelet? To die for…AND they didn’t overcook the asparagus. Did I mention they had fabulous coffee as well?

What was really awesome was that one of my childhood best friends had left her kids with her hubby and come into the city to spend the weekend with us…just like we did when we were kids. Don’t get me wrong, I’d have loved to hang out with her munchkins, but this was some much needed grown up unwinding time, complete with booze.

Drinks and Indian Food

Breakfast at Hotel Sister

Yup! Once she got to town we decided it was the perfect time to pop her cherry. It turned out, she’d never had Indian food, so we took her to Jaipur Indian Restaurant and introduced her to the joys of things like naan, samosas, chicken tikka masala, dal, and the ever so tasty gulab jamun!

And when we’re eating all sorts of flavor exploding dishes, it only made sense to enjoy some lemon-tinis. 🙂

Of course, the morning of the concert I had the pleasure of enjoying familial hospitality at my sister’s place. She made the most amazing baked French toast with a caramel praline topping. She even had home made/tapped syrup that a close friend of theirs harvests on his own. How cool is that?

She also pampered me with awesome cappuccinos and lattes that she made, herself. The only thing missing was the fancy froth designs, and to tell you the truth, I didn’t really miss it. I mean, who am I kidding? It’s not like the folks at Starbucks bother decorating my froth before they put lids on my drinks, either…and hers were even tastier (and FREE!)

Me and a childhood bestie

After such phenomenal home service we decided to chillax a bit, catch up, and enjoy the day. We took my sister’s dog for a walk, visited their local animal shelter, the Anti-Cruelty society. It was pet adoption day and I thanked my lucky stars that I live far away, because it helped prevent me from coming home with every puppy they had up for adoption. How cool is it, though, that they had Darth Vader and some Storm Troopers to help get all those adorable furry friends into new, loving homes? Yeah….there were a lot of folks doing just what my friend did. Selfies with the Star Wars villains. 🙂 Me? I stuck to the huggable, loveable Dalmatian. My sister’s pup got plenty of love and attention from everyone. In fact, their official professional photographer insisted on taking a pic of her dog with the white storm troopers. (While I’m thinking on it, please hold a good thought for him. He’s been having some eye issues that are going to need to be resolved with doggie surgery. We’re hoping they won’t have to take his eye.)

A couple of friends stopped to by to surprise me!

Fish and Chips with Cider

That afternoon, after our dog walking adventure we got ready for an early supper, then the Blake Shelton concert. We decided to head to Duke of Perth for the best fish and chips in town, and some cider to wash it down. What was really awesome was that because I’d checked in on my phone app, a couple of childhood friends stopped in to say hello and give hugs! Don’t you just love surprises like that? It made my day to know that they went out of their way just to stop and say hi.

Although Duke of Perth is quite well known for their whiskey, we wanted to be sober enough to enjoy seeing Dan + Shay, The Band Perry, Neal McCoy, and, of course, Blake….at the legendary Wrigley Field! Now, I’ve always enjoyed Neal McCoy’s music, but after catching his sense of fun and humor, I’ve decided I’d be perfectly okay with being in the center of a Neal and Blake sandwich. 😉 Next to Blake, he was my favorite part of the night.

When the time came to say goodbye to my sister and my favorite town, it was with a heavy heart. There’s something about my home town that uplifts me. I love that no matter how often I come back I discover some new gem either while still being filled with nostalgia. What do you love most about going back home? Or, if you never left, what places would you recommend to someone visiting your home town?

I’ll leave ya’ll with this awesome song… Tell me how many famous guitar players you can name. 😉

Winners, Losers, Technology, and Life

Someone close to me once confided in me after her son committed suicide that she wished she’d taught him coping skills, then she asked me how it was that my mom managed to instill this ability in my sister and me. Although I gave her an answer, her regret had stuck with me. We’ve all heard that hindsight is 20/20, but for her this was a very painful reality with no ‘do overs.’

As she talked, there were things that she looked back on and wondered ‘what if.’ What if she’d worried a little less about him feeling accepted? What if she allowed other family members to voice criticism instead of not allowing anything negative to be said? What if she’d taken her children to church more often? What if they hadn’t given him everything he ever wanted?

It seems to me that two things in our society have been rapidly and consistently gaining large ground. They’re not exactly what I’d call bad or evil, just dangerous if not balanced…and we’re not. Balanced, that is. It’s become a bit of an epidemic and it’s starting early.

When did losing become evil? Countless numbers of my friends and family have talked about the concept of not keeping score for the youngsters just starting out in organized sports or no grades on a report card. The concern is that children need to feel accepted. (And probably to deter the hyper competitive parents from causing scenes.) Don’t get me wrong. I’m all for acceptance, but there are several very important life lessons to be learned in both winning and losing. As for the parents? If you’ve watched Dance Moms or any of the kiddie beauty pageant shows you know that those kinds of people are going to be that way with or without a score.

The first lesson is you’re not always going to be good at everything right away and that’s okay. Some are going to have certain natural gifts while others will need to work at it. There are countless examples from Michael Jordan to Emmitt Smith who were told they weren’t good enough, or big enough, or talented enough to make it, but with hard work and dedication to their dream, they still found a way to make it happen. The second is that there will always be naysayers in your life. It’s your choice whether or not to give them the power to give up your dreams. Third is that regardless of how badly you may want something, sometimes you just won’t have the ability and/or tools to make that dream a reality. It doesn’t mean you stop dreaming…it just means you learn from it; discover the things you are good at and find another dream.

Of course there are also the obvious lessons. Learning to be graceful as you’re winning or losing. Learning that losing a battle doesn’t mean you’ve lost the war. It just may be a temporary setback. Shaking an opponent’s hand in recognition of their job well done (or maybe yours), while strategizing on what you can do to improve your own results next time. Most importantly, winning doesn’t make you a better person than everyone else, and losing isn’t the end of the world. After all, in the real world, no one is going to pull punches. You won’t get a job just because you applied. You may lose a job or relationships. If you’ve never been taught how to handle them as a child, how will you know what to do when you lose the shield of parents and/or youth?

The other thing I’ve noticed is how completely we’ve allowed technology and social media to take over our lives, and not in a good way. Direct communication with people is becoming less and less frequent, and it’s everyone’s loss. By not looking someone in the eyes and talking, we’re becoming desensitized to the people around us.

Twice in the last two days I’ve cringed over the lack of care shown at the devastation of others seen online. I choose not to post the video clip or articles from the two events, but many of you may recognize the stories anyway (and may have seen them for yourselves).

The first happened on Saturday when a close friend expressed her rage over a video clip seen on Facebook. It was supposed to depict the dangers of texting and driving; a message with which I firmly agree. Her problem? When she’d clicked the video she thought it would be a reenactment, but it wasn’t. It was, in fact, a live videotaping of a motor vehicle accident where fatalities and severe injuries had occurred, recorded in all it’s gory glory. Besides the deceased in the video, there were the injured people. The problem was that while all this was being recorded it showed the severely wounded lying on the ground, people (including police) milling around, the injured appearing to be all but ignored. The person recording not being asked to stop. This video was put up on YouTube for the world to watch. It made my friend and I wonder if they took the families of the dead and wounded into account.

The second item was of a young lady who was allegedly drugged, then raped. Apparently she had no idea this even occurred until she discovered that nude and compromising photos of her went viral. One of the perpetrators to the alleged crime sent out all sorts of mocking tweets about the night in question after she went to the police. A potential rape victim splattered online, mocked, then bullied? Are we really so desensitized to the pain of others that this doesn’t bother us?

Then, as if the universe was sending me a message, I heard something coming from the living room. Last night, while I was working on a project, my hubby was watching Girl Meets World (Yeah, we were both Boy Meets World fans, so we decided to check out the new show). The subject turned out to be cell phones! How utterly appropriate, right?

Turns out, Cory has followed in Mr. Feeny’s footsteps, and is now teaching the lessons. I loved that he forced his class to go “old school.” In the beginning of the episode his daughter couldn’t even say “hello” to her crush. It had to come through her phone. By the end….

Maybe I’m over reacting. I mean, I’m the girl who didn’t even have a tv in her home until she was 7. I lived in other countries without the benefit of a phone in my own home until I was 10. I didn’t play video games growing up. I climbed trees, played tackle football in the yard, played school and library (my mom made me stop trying to collect actual late fees on my “library books” from my sister). I wrote my own stories and told them to my younger siblings to entertain them. Am I saying the way I was raised is the right way and everyone else’s is wrong? Not at all! I’m simply saying that maybe we need to find a way to be more engaged in the world around us again instead of hiding behind our phones, tablets, and computer screens.

Care to share your thoughts?

At Death’s Door: a Cover Reveal With Author @Astrid_writes

There’s something about the “Pay It Forward” philosophy that speaks to me. We’ve all been in a place where we’ve needed extra support or a helping hand, both personally and professionally. It was other bloggers and writers who encouraged me, cheered me on, and supported me in various ways that gave me the courage to chase my dreams of becoming published.

So, when I have the opportunity to help a fellow writer/author/blogger, I jump. All anyone has to do is say the word, and I’m there. Excited at the opportunity to help. Just like you guys have done for me.

Today I have the pleasure of sharing the cover reveal for At Death’s Door, the freshman effort by fantasy author, Astrid Tallaksen. Although our genres may be different, her excerpt and beautiful cover certainly caught my eye. I’d love to hear what you guys think…. Check it out!

Blurb:

At Death’s Door

Freefall Series book #1

The world is a pretty straightforward place. Even for medium Sara Stone things seem pretty simple, aside from the whole talking to spirits bit. But when the spirits get too hard to handle and Sara ends up admitted to a mental hospital, the world starts to seem a lot less straightforward. First her family disappears, including her four year old son. Then she gets the sneaking suspicion that not only are the staff at the mental hospital somehow connected, but they also have no intention of ever letting her leave the hospital.

Everything changes when Sara has her first visitor in three months. Daniel is handsome, friendly, and a complete stranger. When he promises to spring her from the hospital and swears that everything she’s experienced is completely real, Sara has no choice but to believe him. But once she reaches a run-down Victorian house in the tiny Alabama town her rescuer calls home, the last thing she expects to discover is that every memory she has is a lie.

Daniel reveals a world filled with angels, demons, and an impending war humans know nothing about. Sara wants to ignore her role in the whole mess – all that matters is solving the mystery of where her son has gone. But the forces of Heaven, Hell, and the Heart have other plans for her. Can she find her child before the world comes crashing down?

Author Bio:

Debut author Astrid V. Tallaksen grew up with a heart for stories of creatures and places outside of this world. Her love of reading quickly became a love of writing. She spent several years creating content and helping writers to improve their craft on the online world of Althanas, a creative writing workshop in the guise of a roleplaying forum. A self-avowed nerd, Astrid loves science fiction, comic books, and eighties fantasy movies in the vein of The Princess Bride and Labyrinth. Her geekiness extends to annual volunteer work at the massive sci-fi convention known as Dragon*con every year in Atlanta, Georgia. In the odd times that she’s not immersed in geekdom or writing, Astrid loves to sing karaoke, crochet, and spend time with her family and pets.

Ways to follow Astrid:

Facebook – authorastridvtallaksen
Twitter – @astrid_writes
Blog – authorastridvtallaksen.wordpress.com/

Baiser d’Amour

My Wedding Day

 

Smooth, gentle glide
A whispered breath,
Glanced soft on skin,
Delve inside.
Sweet seduction,
Satin lips;
Tangled heat,
Wet, velvet tongues
Battle–
Sear of desire,
Moaned surrender,
Captured,
Swallowed,
Shared.
Sealed
In passion’s kiss.

In honor of International Kissing Day I thought I’d write a poem. After all, passion starts with the mind, then a kiss, then everywhere else. A kiss can say so much…and so little. No one sings kisses better than Shania Twain.

Where does passion begin for you? Is there a song about kissing that melts your heart? I’m in a romantic mood tonight and would love if you’d share.

And just in case you missed it, we’re in the last few hours of my birthday weekend and I’m giving stuff away to say thanks for all the support you guys have shown me.

#FREE to Celebrate My Birthday With Me

Today, for those of us in the United States, we honor our Independence Day. It’s a day when we reflect on our freedoms, say thanks to those who came before us who fought for our rights (and those who still battle to uphold those freedoms) and celebrate with cook outs, neighborhood and beach parties, and end with fireworks.

It’s also my birthday!

As a Thank You to all of you who have supported me, either by reading my blog, sharing my posts, friending me on Facebook or following on Twitter, or just for being YOU, I’m giving away my first book, Three For All and have dropped the sequel, Four One Night to $.99 on Amazon Kindle for this holiday weekend. (The links attached in this paragraph lead to excerpts.)

To get your FREE copy, simply click the book cover.

To take advantage of the discounted offer, click the cover below.

So, once again, thanks for helping my writing dream come true by supporting me by words of encouragement, by giving me the opportunity to get to know you on my blog or social media through comments (or laughter), by buying my books, or sharing them….and/or by leaving a review.

And finally, Happy Birthday to ME! 🙂 Thanks for helping me celebrate!