I have a fascination for restraints and bondage….
Not on me, mind you. I’m a bit too much of a control freak to ever feel comfortable enough to willingly place myself in someone else’s power. But someone trusting me enough to voluntarily give themselves over into my care? Especially in a sensual manner? What a turn on!
I probably should have noticed when I was younger that I had a thing for being on top, taking my much bigger and stronger boyfriends’ (hello, I’m 5’3″ and only weighed about 105 lbs back then, so of course they were bigger) wrists into my hand and holding them over their head while I kissed them senseless. Yes, even though that immobilization was pretty much voluntary and all about the imagery & sense of helplessness more so than the real deal, it got my juices going.
It may explain why, at the age of 18, I “tied” my boyfriend down with some thumb cuffs. He was 6′ tall and about 160 lbs. of muscle, but he was helpless while I explored his body with my tongue until he begged for mercy. Oh, so much fun.
And then I discovered rope bondage through reading and the internet and became very intrigued. Also known as rigging, it’s both an art and a sexy practice. At least to my way of thinking. It’s one of those items that’s definitely on my “must learn” list.
If you’re interested in experimenting in bondage there are several safety aspects to keep in mind:
- You may want to consider staying away from ties, scarves, and/or silky materials if your partner loves to struggle against their bindings. These materials will tighten up if you fight your bindings too hard and will tighten, causing circulation to become cut off.
- Make sure to have some sort of shears/scissors if you’re going to play with clothing or ropes. You never know when you might need to free your partner quickly, and you need to be able to cut through bindings. You can’t guarantee that your partner won’t panic and need a rescue.
- Have a safe word and don’t be afraid to use it. Both you AND your partner need to trust each other. Bondage requires both that and patience.
- Bondage is not ideal if one or both parties have been drinking. Tying someone up requires time, patience, and trust. By the way, this is true regardless of what kind of bondage you might indulge in.
There. You have my kink confession. Now it’s your turn. What kink have you always either been curious about or wanted to try? Judgment free zone, right here!
5 thoughts on “T is for Tied Up”
Hmmm, I’m not sure I have anything to comment about this subject. 😉
P.S. I thought of one short comment, but must return later given my very busy morning & day… so you’ll have to accept your “deprevation” Kitt. 😈
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I thought I wore my freak flag with pride! Was I too subtle? 😀
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“T is for Tied Up” Indeed! Not necessarily literal either!
In my experiences Kitt, to say “Life is not always as it seems…” is often a gross understatement. Take for example, a woman I’ve met. A woman who is wonderfully and invigoratingly OPEN-MINDED! She is an active staunch feminist; has been for several years. She despises all forms of sexism, misogyny, and patriarchal norms. In fact, my word “despises” probably doesn’t do justice to how deeply she feels about those social issues.
Then she met me.
She met the S.S.C. BDSM side of me. To her great credit she patiently and courteously listened to me, asked many questions, trying very hard to wrap her head around women consciously conscenting to a “role” of submission and/or bottoming to me or any Dom-Top man in an Age of increasing social equality. Then it happened…
…she began craving my Topping/Dom-ing NOT BECAUSE she weakened or was a fake — no, no…not at all — but purely because of my approach to her she said, because I never waivered, she said, “…in my patient, polite, lofty respect toward her, mixed with addictive, erotic, sensual words with intense hints of seduction.” Her words Kitt. As a result of the totally unexpected turn of events between two personalities, seemingly and permanently OPPOSED to each other… began our online/internet BDSM “scenes” of what our lifestyle is much about: the mind-f#ck. Mind-f#cks over a 5,000 mile distance actually.
That distance is one example of highly pleasurable “T is for Tied Up” S.S.C. BDSM. 😉
The other is that she is also married… the other “Tied Up”… which causes me several ethical moral issues and begs the question…
Are there “tied ups” that are very good and “tied ups” that are bad? Why or why not? Easy questions, right? 😀 😛
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I have my ropes and handcuffs! 😉
Be right over…