Define Sexy….

Confession time…

I have sexy men on the brain. Okay, let me clarify…It’s not so much sexy men as what makes men sexy to me. I’ve been thinking about a project I’m working on. Then someone had to Tweet something on Twitter that had me doing this:

Squirrel

Who could distract me from my work?

Why Alex O’Laughlin, of course! He’s hot as a vamp…even hotter as 5-O… He has a bad boy streak that I find incredibly appealing.

So what makes men attractive to me? A bit of a bad boy streak…(That should be obvious). Intelligence. A sense of humor. And a bit of unexpected chivalry.

The truth is… I can kick ass all by myself. I find it sexy when men acknowledge that and let women fight their own battles…but are on stand by…just in case she decides she needs to tag him in.  Like Christian Kane’s Eliot Spencer… Yum! He trusts the women on his team to handle their part and tag him in as needed. Oh, and he can sing…and play guitar…and cook!

Then there’s the man that can write…sing…and can tickle my ivories anytime. Like Phil Vassar.

And then there’s raw physicality…(Combined with humor…it’s lethal for me…) So of course, I have a mad crush on Triple H!

What characteristics make a person sexy to you? (Hey it’s only fair that after I did my Girl Crushes segment that I gave my men equal time.)

Complimentary Insults?

Have you ever been on the receiving end of something that sounded like an insult only to realize that it was meant as a compliment? A gal pal and I were talking about that today.

Remember the guy I talked about last week? Well, the story didn’t completely end there. Here’s how our “I’m married” conversation went:

Him: It’s too bad I met you now that you’re getting ready to leave!
Me: Aww, you’re sweet.
Him: So would you like to hang out before you go? I’d like to take you to dinner or buy you a drink or something.
Me: It’s nice of you to ask, but I’m married.
Him: Like newly married or MARRIED married?
Me: Like married to my best friend married.
Him: It figures. All the good ones are. You’re just so pretty and have a big ass. I like the way you look

For two seconds I was all…did he really just tell me I have a big ass? How rude! Then I realized he likes the J-Lo booty types…and he meant it as a compliment. Fortunately I was able to process it before I responded with “Thanks!”

Then I started thinking to other compliments that could be misread as insults that I’ve either heard in songs or seen on tv shows and movies, etc.

“Girl, you’re so thick…You fill out that outfit so well!”

“You’ve got some big lips! Mmmm!”

“Look at those muscles…You look like you could do some damage to a man.”

You get my drift… For whatever reason, I’m finding this whole line of “compliments” to be hilarious. What “compliments” have you been given that could be misrepresented as insults?

Now I have to hit the treadmill…LMAO!

Is Women’s Lib Killing Our Alpha Males?

At the risk of offending some people, I’m going to be candid. Maybe it’s because of a post I read last month from Once A Month 4 Ladies or maybe it’s the election or maybe it’s a memory of an old friend, but people’s perceptions on feminism lately have been driving me nuts.

First I’ll tell you what I do believe:

  • Women deserve to have the right to vote (you may say duh, but that’s actually a fairly recent right!)
  • Women of equal experience and education as men deserve to be paid at the same salary
  • Women should be able to try out for any type of sport, and if they’re talented, deserve equal consideration as their male counterparts

I may have forgot a thing or two in my list, but I think you get the general gist. And then there are the extremists when it comes to women’s lib. They kind of ruin it for everyone because they send mixed messages to the male gender. Earlier I mentioned a friend. My friend and I were out with a bunch of people one day (mind you, we were in high school). We’d just arrived at the restaurant when one of the guys from our group walked ahead of us and opened the door for us. I said thank you. She snapped at him, telling him she wasn’t weak and she could get the door for herself. Confused, I pulled her aside. She explained to me that she wanted to be “treated like an equal” and not some “weaker sex”.

I was completely floored! Never in my wildest dreams did I think that “women’s lib” had made it all the way into the dating scene. Maybe it’s old fashioned of me, but I don’t think it has any business in the dating scene. I’m not a “go Dutch” kind of girl. I like when a guy opens the door for me or pulls a chair out for me. I don’t see that as him treating me as a member of a “weaker sex”. I see it as the man I’m with paying his respects…and in some very old school, old world way…maybe paying homage to the beauty of womankind in general.

And yet these days men walk on egg shells, unsure of what’s expected of them. We women bitch and bemoan the loss of the “alpha male” and that men “don’t treat us right” when they don’t take charge or he pauses at the end of the night, unsure if he should be paying for the whole tab or part of it. Who do we have to blame for this? Ourselves!

You want an alpha male? Stop trying to neuter him! When he opens a door, say thank you and smile! When he holds out your chair for you, find a way to let him know it’s meant something and that you appreciate the effort. And no, for my dirty birdie friends out there, I don’t mean crawl under the table and “show him gratitude”…well, unless you want to. (hehehe!) I mean maybe touch his arm or make eye contact and give him that special smile that lets him know you really appreciate the gesture. And for goodness sake, ladies…don’t go on a dutch treat date unless you got suckered into one.  Usually that’s the beginning of something not so special…”if you know what I mean”. 😉

What about you ladies?  Gentlemen?  Care to weigh in on this topic?  How do you feel about women’s lib?  Am I the only one who thinks it’s gone too far when it’s pushed it’s way into the dating scene? Are there other places where it’s crept in and done more harm than good? Inquiring minds wanna know!

I enjoy the mystique that women posess. I like being treated like something special. I thrive on being flirted with and doted on….and I don’t think that should be out of date or old fashioned. I also like those alpha men who enjoy taking charge but respect the fact that women have minds of their own and are able to think for themselves and fight their own battles (but offer to always be there for back up if needed).